Innocence Lost 

I had a very healthy early childhood, but things took a turn for the worse around the time I entered first grade. Once I learned how to read, it seems like diseases took this as a cue to begin attacking me. I can’t think of one single day since then that I’ve been at 100% health. Well, not before I started taking Placebonin, that is. I just can’t live without my Placebonin! And (don’t tell anyone, they say we’re not supposed to mix it with anything) it tastes great in coffee and tea! Placebonin for everyone! - Mary

Invisible Enemies  Much has been made of my so-called "eccentricity", but it is my sad duty to report that I am one of the few sane people on this planet. Few people realize how many millions of microscopic bacteria and other foul creatures crawl on nearly every conceivable surface. There just isn’t enough water on planet earth to wash one’s hands clean enough! My awareness of these germs forced me into constant relocation, as well as into behavior that other people libelously described as "mentally incompetent". If it’s "mentally incompetent" to burn one’s sheets and pillowcases each morning, or to melt down and re-mold door handles each time they’re handled by human hands, then I don’t want to be mentally competent! Thankfully, Placebonin kills many of these invisible enemies on contact, but you can never be too careful. This is why I receive over 10,000 milligrams of the stuff daily. It’s the only sure-fire way to stave off the inevitable frontal assault from these pathetically underestimated critters. - Howard  Click here to share your own experiences.