How Placebonin Works

To be honest, we’re not entirely sure. Modern medical science stands at an interesting crossroads right now— countless medications are being discovered and approved for general use on a daily basis, yet many of the companies producing these medications don’t exactly know how they work. The extremely popular anti-impotence pill Viagra, for example, began as a treatment for blood pressure. Only after the initial battery of tests was an interesting (and much more useful) side effect discovered. Similarly, the manufacturers of two other "top ten" pharmaceuticals— Prozac and Ritalin— have no earthly idea how their products work.

The important thing is that their effectiveness has been conclusively proven, and in this regard, Placebonin is no different. In over 90% of test cases, patients suffering from mild to severe hypochondria were given doses of Placebonin and showed significant improvement almost immediately. And so, we here at AAlgar Pharmaceuticals have adopted a philosophical approach to the whole situation: we don’t care how it works, as long as it makes you well again. (We are legally obligated to state here that we don’t actually care if you get well or not either; only in how much money you give us. But don’t let that stop you. We couldn’t make all that money unless our product actually worked, you know.)

[ See graphics below ]

Some sort of graphic representation of a part of your body. Those little yellow things are either Advil™ or germs. To be on the safe side, we recommend you take some Placebonin. Assuming we were right about that previous illustration, we can therefore assume that this is what happens to the germs after you've taken Placebonin. Yeah, that's the ticket. The final (alleged) stages of Placebonin. Note the green thingies (conveniently highlighted by the arrows). We're not sure what they are, but it's never a bad idea to note things with arrows pointing at them.